First thing, a nice new blue car stops, and the driver tells me forget it he doesn't have change, so I jump off at the next robot and hail another one. This driver is more courteous and accepts my cash. Soon we have caught up to the nice new blue car (one of those fancy Toyota Quantums the government is pushing the taxi bosses to purchase as part of the recap) and on the back of the car I see the following
HOW IS MY DRIVING?
071 16 381
As far as I can remember there are 10 digits in an SA cell number. This little terror has scratched off 2 digits and left it there... hmm... it will take some working on but I'm sure I can figure it out. Number puzzles. Yay.
Anyway. I digress. The reason this nonevent stuck in my mind is because in the afternoon the taxi I caught had a real slow driver. Real slow. This guy went through a red robot. Just like that. At first the car is quiet and then everyone erupts... what the fuck, baba?! kinda thing.... This guy, this baba of note, he's grinning and you can see he just totally missed it... straight through.... Ten minutes later, Jesus, he almost does it again... this time everyone pipes up just before he tears through it and he stops just in time. Next, he's stopped at the side of the road, the door's open someone's getting out and he starts to pull off. Once again the taxi erupts... baba, what the fuck?! All this guy can do is grin as if he doesn't have a care in the world...
On the last leg to Bree I'm the only passenger left. You can bet I'm holding on... Baba, your car has shite shocks, is shimmying from side to side on piss-poor alignment and you can't see worth fuck. In the words of the one true bob... Stop the train I'm leaving... which is damn well what I did.
Sometimes, these guys... perpetual slow boat I tells ya.
WHITE TAXI, by White Man Jumping
is brought to you by
TSHIRT TERRORIST
Tshirts To Die For!
www.tshirtterrorist.co.za

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